The X Files

Sitting here on a Saturday evening, having popped into Bromley to pick up a Fred Perry for the upcoming Specials gig at Brixton on Monday and then going to the gym in the ongoing battle to turn my one pack into a six, I wasn’t particularly planning on writing a blog, but a couple of things have caught my eye. Oh yes.

So here I am.

We start with an apparent hardening of position from the manager regarding his youth policy. He asks if he is supposed to “kick out a quality young player like Diaby” to accommodate any incoming signings. Whaaaaaaaaaaat? In fairness, I should point out that he also mentioned Walcott, Fabregas and Bendtner here. But whilst there may be doubts about Bendtner and Walcott in the here and now, I don’t think it’s unfair to assume there is a great deal more to come from them. Diaby on the other hand… I just don’t see it. Ok, on a couple of occasions this season he has looked stunning. But I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect more from him. He isn’t a kid anymore. More to the point, his favoured position appears to be the one off the striker. Now if someone can tell me what he can do there that makes him more effective than Arshavin, Nasri or – let’s go mental here – Robin van Persie, I’m very interested to hear it.

Speaking of the boy Bendtner, Arsène has sniffed out a conspiracy theory worth of The X Files’ Lone Gunmen. Or should that be Lone Gunner?

Anyway, Bendtner was not drunk and in fact, his pants were pulled down for him. By whom, we do not know, and why he was unable to pull them back up is unexplained as well. Truly, this is a case for Mulder and Scully. Though I suspect were Agent Scully to get involved, she’d tell le boss to stop being so silly and put him to bed.

Finally, and this is my favourite for the day – having heard Myles Palmer go on and on and on and on and on about how Xabi Alonso was at Arsenal, ready to sign, in the summer only for the deal to break down over, first, £2m and subsequently 200 grand (perhaps Myles misplaced a decimal somewhere) he has had to publish this email from the Liverpool Echo. Which says that Alonso was never in London and, in fact, closer to signing for the Old lady of Turin than for us. So that’s another conspiracy theory debunked and more Palmer bollocks to be shown for what it is.

How apt, all this talk of conspiracy theories the day before our clash with the most paranoid football club in the country, if not Europe. Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean everyone doesn’t hate you, I suppose… It’s a difficult one to preview, really. To all intents and purposes the league season is over, even if we beat Chelsea tomorrow, given we have to go Old Trafford next week, are we really expecting to overhaul them? The massive downer they suffered on Wednesday might aid us, as could the need for our players and supporters to show the world that we aren’t a bunch of lily livered jessies, but if Arshavin hasn’t recovered from his virus – and we all saw how Sagna played, having apparently recovered, at Liverpool – it’s going to be tricky. I’m looking forward to it though.