Farzad Stoned
Self-appointed Deprogrammer for the Cult of Mik 🟥
Country: USA
Player:Havertz
Why? praise me I don’t believe in imaginary angry sky daddies
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Draft CL Draft - Last 12 - Farzad Wanderers vs Sapient Hawk FC
- Thread starter albakos
- Start date
- Replies 65
- Views 2,637
Country: USA
Player:Havertz
Mashallah akhi GDeep hows fasting going for you this year?
Farzad Stoned
Self-appointed Deprogrammer for the Cult of Mik 🟥
Country: USA
Player:Havertz
I have to say that match reports are getting better and better
@Rex Bezos is to online draft games what Lexington Steele is to dongs, many claim the pedigree but few can whip it out
- Thread starter
- #24
Country: Kosova
Player:Saka
@Rex Bezos brilliant reporting mate.
Reminds me when I commentated my win vs. @GDeep™ where he was crushed by 19-7, and he never recovered from it as never got into a draft again
Reminds me when I commentated my win vs. @GDeep™ where he was crushed by 19-7, and he never recovered from it as never got into a draft again
Riou
In The Winchester, Waiting For This To Blow Over
Country: Northern Ireland
Player:Gabriel
Player:Tomiyasu
Farzad Stoned
Self-appointed Deprogrammer for the Cult of Mik 🟥
Country: USA
Player:Havertz
No mate it is much more fun to complain and concoct conspiracy theories. I would rather p.ss into the tent then be forced to p.ss outside it. I just need a good eurozone teammate so i can sleep hit me up we will combine our bad luck in math two negatives make a positive
Farzad Stoned
Self-appointed Deprogrammer for the Cult of Mik 🟥
Country: USA
Player:Havertz
The chucky doll of AM draft resurfaces. You in mate no need to ask. I must protect your legacy as the only man to go 0-4 in a single elimination contest. A record that will stand the test of time
Riou
In The Winchester, Waiting For This To Blow Over
Country: Northern Ireland
Player:Gabriel
We need to bring Kolo in for that big racist Terry, like @2Smokeyy said.
Chelsea won the final he didn't play in and lost the one he did play in, because the big oaf bottled it...we gotta make that change bruh, reckon we clinch this if we do!
Farzad Stoned
Self-appointed Deprogrammer for the Cult of Mik 🟥
Country: USA
Player:Havertz
I would do it but you lose goals and Terry rated higher i think he also bagged 4 goals in 10 or 11 games. But i am not opposed when teams have attacked us it has been down Carlos left but he creates a lot. Be interested to see how much Carlos creates and our defensive record. We can try Kolo in return leg it might be a good time to freshen up back line.
Country: Wales
So the second leg is done... let's see what happened...
In the days before the match chaos swirled around @farzad4daarse and his Wanderers team. He brought up time and time again the lazy and incompetent backroom staff that had cost him the first leg win while he was in the stands with their stupid substitutions.
He then takes the incredible step of "1099ing" his entire backroom staff, deciding to hire low paid contractors from Colombia to do the work instead. As the match rolls around though they feel good about steamrolling the absolute worst team in the competition by a healthy margin.
On the other hand @Sapient Hawk is in a selection dilemma of his own. His relationship with Zalayeta is almost beyond saving but after his plucky display in the first leg he feels like he deserves one more chance in the starting XI.
On game day the Camp Farz is an absolute cauldron of hostile noise. Worse still, unless they get a 3 goal of more draw or somehow win for only the fourth time all year the Hawks are heading home.
The whistle goes, the game starts and immediately Wanderers are on the attack, a quick ball up to Lewandowski who puts a lovely cushioned header down for Del Piero, who takes it on the half volley...
AND
it deflects agonisingly wide of the post off of a Basile Boli boot!
No matter, from the corner Neymar puts a great ball in with curve and speed. Up rises John Terry and the Farzad skipper plants it into the net off his forehead!
The crowd goes wild but wait!!! The referee has blown for a foul, Terry apparently climbed all over Walter Samuel his nemesis from the first leg and the goal is wiped away. @farzad4daarse explodes from his technical area at the referee and the normally polite @Sapient Hawk loses his rag and starts fighting with the Wanderers boss!
:focal(1265x416:1267x414)/origin-imgresizer.eurosport.com/2014/10/05/1326836-28530285-2560-1440.jpg)
the referee and players rush to break them off but not before Farzad tries to get into a fight with chief agitator Walter Samuel. The Colombian contractors manage to restrain him and he sits seething on the bench.
Farzad's mood is hardly improved when minutes later the ball is moved out to Ronald de Boer on the left flank.
For some crazy reason he's not closed down, Kyle Walker sits off and off allowing De Boer to slap a shot with his left foot that...
FINDS IT'S WAY IN!!
Absolute clanger at his near post from Alisson and incredibly the Hawks have taken the lead! They didn't even sell out their away delegation they were so sure of a battering and now they've taken a huge step towards a last 8 place!
An absolute travesty defensively from the goalkeeper and right back, they dare not look at their manager fuming on the bench.
Wanderers start forcing the issue now and they carve open a great chance for Lewandowski played in by an incredible Neymar pass but one on one with Almunia he hits it right at him and the chance goes begging.
It's not long before tempers flare again and this time it's Farzinho exploding at De Boer for taking too long to take a throw in. Walter Samuel charges in again and this time he and @farzad4daarse come to blows, the stadium erupts and the fans rain rubbish and coins down on the pitch while the Colombian contractors start grappling with the Hawks players.
The referee shows Farzad the red card for the second time in three games and he has to be dragged into the tunnel by the support staff but not before kicking the ball and the referee's whistle away in a show of disgust.
The referee turns to Samuel and he gives him...
A YELLOW CARD!
Once again a shower of coins and rubbish is emptied onto the pitch and the game halted. Eventually the first half is drawn to a close after an insane 15 minutes of injury time, all down to fighting.
In the days before the match chaos swirled around @farzad4daarse and his Wanderers team. He brought up time and time again the lazy and incompetent backroom staff that had cost him the first leg win while he was in the stands with their stupid substitutions.
He then takes the incredible step of "1099ing" his entire backroom staff, deciding to hire low paid contractors from Colombia to do the work instead. As the match rolls around though they feel good about steamrolling the absolute worst team in the competition by a healthy margin.
On the other hand @Sapient Hawk is in a selection dilemma of his own. His relationship with Zalayeta is almost beyond saving but after his plucky display in the first leg he feels like he deserves one more chance in the starting XI.
On game day the Camp Farz is an absolute cauldron of hostile noise. Worse still, unless they get a 3 goal of more draw or somehow win for only the fourth time all year the Hawks are heading home.
The whistle goes, the game starts and immediately Wanderers are on the attack, a quick ball up to Lewandowski who puts a lovely cushioned header down for Del Piero, who takes it on the half volley...
AND
it deflects agonisingly wide of the post off of a Basile Boli boot!
No matter, from the corner Neymar puts a great ball in with curve and speed. Up rises John Terry and the Farzad skipper plants it into the net off his forehead!
The crowd goes wild but wait!!! The referee has blown for a foul, Terry apparently climbed all over Walter Samuel his nemesis from the first leg and the goal is wiped away. @farzad4daarse explodes from his technical area at the referee and the normally polite @Sapient Hawk loses his rag and starts fighting with the Wanderers boss!
the referee and players rush to break them off but not before Farzad tries to get into a fight with chief agitator Walter Samuel. The Colombian contractors manage to restrain him and he sits seething on the bench.
Farzad's mood is hardly improved when minutes later the ball is moved out to Ronald de Boer on the left flank.
For some crazy reason he's not closed down, Kyle Walker sits off and off allowing De Boer to slap a shot with his left foot that...
FINDS IT'S WAY IN!!
Absolute clanger at his near post from Alisson and incredibly the Hawks have taken the lead! They didn't even sell out their away delegation they were so sure of a battering and now they've taken a huge step towards a last 8 place!
An absolute travesty defensively from the goalkeeper and right back, they dare not look at their manager fuming on the bench.
Wanderers start forcing the issue now and they carve open a great chance for Lewandowski played in by an incredible Neymar pass but one on one with Almunia he hits it right at him and the chance goes begging.
It's not long before tempers flare again and this time it's Farzinho exploding at De Boer for taking too long to take a throw in. Walter Samuel charges in again and this time he and @farzad4daarse come to blows, the stadium erupts and the fans rain rubbish and coins down on the pitch while the Colombian contractors start grappling with the Hawks players.
The referee shows Farzad the red card for the second time in three games and he has to be dragged into the tunnel by the support staff but not before kicking the ball and the referee's whistle away in a show of disgust.
The referee turns to Samuel and he gives him...
A YELLOW CARD!
Once again a shower of coins and rubbish is emptied onto the pitch and the game halted. Eventually the first half is drawn to a close after an insane 15 minutes of injury time, all down to fighting.
Farzad Stoned
Self-appointed Deprogrammer for the Cult of Mik 🟥
Country: USA
Player:Havertz
Great i get compared to Jose, it could be worse at least you didn’t post pics of Putin. @Sapient Hawk is pulling off a shock upset.
Uncle Good-Advice
Active Member
Imagine that...
Riou
In The Winchester, Waiting For This To Blow Over
Country: Northern Ireland
Player:Gabriel
Country: Saudi Arabia
It's all fun & good until you're reminded by @Rex Bezos at every third sentence that you're the Champion's League's equivalent of Accrington Stanley.
Also, the beef I have with Zalayeta is worthy of its own Telenovela at this stage
Country: Saudi Arabia
So the second leg is done... let's see what happened...
In the days before the match chaos swirled around @farzad4daarse and his Wanderers team. He brought up time and time again the lazy and incompetent backroom staff that had cost him the first leg win while he was in the stands with their stupid substitutions.
He then takes the incredible step of "1099ing" his entire backroom staff, deciding to hire low paid contractors from Colombia to do the work instead. As the match rolls around though they feel good about steamrolling the absolute worst team in the competition by a healthy margin.
On the other hand @Sapient Hawk is in a selection dilemma of his own. His relationship with Zalayeta is almost beyond saving but after his plucky display in the first leg he feels like he deserves one more chance in the starting XI.
On game day the Camp Farz is an absolute cauldron of hostile noise. Worse still, unless they get a 3 goal of more draw or somehow win for only the fourth time all year the Hawks are heading home.
The whistle goes, the game starts and immediately Wanderers are on the attack, a quick ball up to Lewandowski who puts a lovely cushioned header down for Del Piero, who takes it on the half volley...
AND
it deflects agonisingly wide of the post off of a Basile Boli boot!
No matter, from the corner Neymar puts a great ball in with curve and speed. Up rises John Terry and the Farzad skipper plants it into the net off his forehead!
The crowd goes wild but wait!!! The referee has blown for a foul, Terry apparently climbed all over Walter Samuel his nemesis from the first leg and the goal is wiped away. @farzad4daarse explodes from his technical area at the referee and the normally polite @Sapient Hawk loses his rag and starts fighting with the Wanderers boss!
the referee and players rush to break them off but not before Farzad tries to get into a fight with chief agitator Walter Samuel. The Colombian contractors manage to restrain him and he sits seething on the bench.
Farzad's mood is hardly improved when minutes later the ball is moved out to Ronald de Boer on the left flank.
For some crazy reason he's not closed down, Kyle Walker sits off and off allowing De Boer to slap a shot with his left foot that...
FINDS IT'S WAY IN!!
Absolute clanger at his near post from Alisson and incredibly the Hawks have taken the lead! They didn't even sell out their away delegation they were so sure of a battering and now they've taken a huge step towards a last 8 place!
An absolute travesty defensively from the goalkeeper and right back, they dare not look at their manager fuming on the bench.
Wanderers start forcing the issue now and they carve open a great chance for Lewandowski played in by an incredible Neymar pass but one on one with Almunia he hits it right at him and the chance goes begging.
It's not long before tempers flare again and this time it's Farzinho exploding at De Boer for taking too long to take a throw in. Walter Samuel charges in again and this time he and @farzad4daarse come to blows, the stadium erupts and the fans rain rubbish and coins down on the pitch while the Colombian contractors start grappling with the Hawks players.
The referee shows Farzad the red card for the second time in three games and he has to be dragged into the tunnel by the support staff but not before kicking the ball and the referee's whistle away in a show of disgust.
The referee turns to Samuel and he gives him...
A YELLOW CARD!
Once again a shower of coins and rubbish is emptied onto the pitch and the game halted. Eventually the first half is drawn to a close after an insane 15 minutes of injury time, all down to fighting.
Another Dutchman saves my arse yet again!!
Stroopwafels for everyone
Farzad Stoned
Self-appointed Deprogrammer for the Cult of Mik 🟥
Country: USA
Player:Havertz
Stroopwafels are delicious with a nice dark roast coffeeAnother Dutchman saves my arse yet again!!
Stroopwafels for everyone
Country: Wales
Onto the second half and there's legitimate concerns amongst the referees that their safety may be in jeopardy with the tempers reaching boiling point in the sell out Camp Farz crowd. Somehow an angry fan in the crowd has been able to get hold of a very lifelike referee effigy and noose which they pass around the entire lower tier.
Meanwhile on the pitch the game descends into chaos as a riled up Hawks team rack up double digit fouls by the 50th minute and keep on going. Despite being on a yellow card and clearly having lost his head, Walter Samuel makes foul after foul on Neymar with the referee seemingly afraid to send him off and cause another melee.
There's non stop pushing and arguing, which breaks up any rhythm in the game at all. With the Colombian assistant manager panicking he throws Koke to try and get the one goal they need to salvage the tie.
And it starts to work...
Neymar works a one - two with Koke and fizzes a shot to the bottom corner which....
ALMUNIA SOMEHOW PUSHES ONTO THE POST
Lewandwoski follows in and...
hits it right at Almunia AGAIN!
The ball is scrambled away by Boli to maybe the only pacy player in the Hawks side Angulo, who dodges a flying tackle from the substitute Kolo Toure and has now got a three on one in his favour... he sends a great ball across the box right into the path of...
SHERINGHAM!!!
The Camp Farz explodes into boos as the Hawk players sh*thouse a celebration in front of the Wanderers bench. This again causes a melee and 10 minute delay. Once again no card for Walter Samuel after he gets a trilogy fight with John Terry.
After this the life is sucked from the team and it instead becomes a dirty, nasty mess of a game. When the referee blows the final whistle the stadium is half empty. The camera pans to the stand but @farzad4daarse is nowhere to be seen.
As Lewandowski, Walker and Alisson begin their long walk home after being denied access to their own team coach a TV camera crew after the game later happens to capture Farzad waiting for Walter Samuel in the stadium car park. It's never confirmed if he's successful.
Final Score: Farzad Wanderers 0 - 2 Sapient Hawks
Sapient Hawks go through 4-2 on aggregate to face @bingobob and Hunskelpers FC in the next round.
Meanwhile on the pitch the game descends into chaos as a riled up Hawks team rack up double digit fouls by the 50th minute and keep on going. Despite being on a yellow card and clearly having lost his head, Walter Samuel makes foul after foul on Neymar with the referee seemingly afraid to send him off and cause another melee.
There's non stop pushing and arguing, which breaks up any rhythm in the game at all. With the Colombian assistant manager panicking he throws Koke to try and get the one goal they need to salvage the tie.
And it starts to work...
Neymar works a one - two with Koke and fizzes a shot to the bottom corner which....
ALMUNIA SOMEHOW PUSHES ONTO THE POST
Lewandwoski follows in and...
hits it right at Almunia AGAIN!
The ball is scrambled away by Boli to maybe the only pacy player in the Hawks side Angulo, who dodges a flying tackle from the substitute Kolo Toure and has now got a three on one in his favour... he sends a great ball across the box right into the path of...
SHERINGHAM!!!
The Camp Farz explodes into boos as the Hawk players sh*thouse a celebration in front of the Wanderers bench. This again causes a melee and 10 minute delay. Once again no card for Walter Samuel after he gets a trilogy fight with John Terry.
After this the life is sucked from the team and it instead becomes a dirty, nasty mess of a game. When the referee blows the final whistle the stadium is half empty. The camera pans to the stand but @farzad4daarse is nowhere to be seen.
As Lewandowski, Walker and Alisson begin their long walk home after being denied access to their own team coach a TV camera crew after the game later happens to capture Farzad waiting for Walter Samuel in the stadium car park. It's never confirmed if he's successful.
Final Score: Farzad Wanderers 0 - 2 Sapient Hawks
Sapient Hawks go through 4-2 on aggregate to face @bingobob and Hunskelpers FC in the next round.
Country: Saudi Arabia
Even though we're at opposite ends of this titanic battle, I must admit that you're a man after my own heart & salute you as a connoisseur of the finer things in life!!
Uncle Good-Advice
Active Member
Based on this we should sign Samuel to replace Saliba asap.
Congratulations @Sapient Hawk @farzad4daarse - great game
Congratulations @Sapient Hawk @farzad4daarse - great game
