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Let's all laugh at Man Utd: Cristiano Gonealdo


I reject your reality, I substitute my own !!
The most notable individual criticism was directed towards his former Ajax centre-back Martinez, whose 5ft 9in (175cm) height came under scrutiny. Martinez was substituted, along with left-back Luke Shaw and midfielder Fred, at half-time with United already four goals down.

The Argentinian was the one central defender Ten Hag had been sure would start on Wednesday, with Varane and Maguire vying to partner him. By the time the second half began against Brentford, it was Maguire and Varane alongside one another. Ten Hag said he would have had cause to substitute any of his 11 starting players had the option been available.

Brentford goalkeeper David Raya said his team had planned to target a long ball to their powerful striker Ivan Toney, who went up against Martinez.

Raya said: “That was the game plan today — kicking it long, to utilise Ivan’s strengths in the air. We used it the whole game and it paid off.”

Toney himself added: “My qualities in the air is something we worked on. I’m obviously up against a smaller centre-back. It was a good game plan.

“I was just trying to put my body about and get the better of him. To be fair to him, he was doing well. He was very aggressive for a centre-back. Sometimes he gets beat in the air but he was aggressive on the floor. I felt like it was 50-50. Like you said, it’s a compliment to me, him getting subbed off at half-time, whether it was because of me or if it was the style of play they wanted to go for.”

Martinez was a specific target of Ten Hag in this summer’s window, having played the previous three seasons for the Dutch coach at Ajax.

Interestingly, The Athletic has learned United’s scouting network watched numerous Ajax games in recent seasons and despite Martinez often featuring, he was not a player flagged as worthy of closer examination for Ten Hag’s predecessors Ole Gunnar Solskjaer and Ralf Rangnick.

Some scouts were said to be concerned Martinez was a player who could become trapped at set pieces.


Similarly, although Malacia impressed for United during pre-season, The Athletic has also heard he was a player Wales specifically sought to target in their game plan — due to his 5ft 7in height and their estimation of his abilities — during two Nations League fixtures against the Netherlands in June.
Hahahah, like I said, these players will be targeted. And they can't play their new signings for LCB and LB at the same time. It's pretty funny because if for example Shaw (who hasn't performed very well recently) gets injured (like he often does, or plays badly) if they play Malacia in his place, Martinez basically must be benched. Their 57 million pound LCB signing. :lol:

If they have Martinez and Malacia on the left at the same time, basically the long ball can be almost as bad execution as possible, and still United will likely lose it.

It's also interesting that if United plans to press high, this option for long balls for the opposing team is very inviting and there will be more space to exploit.

I can't understand how they went for both Martinez and Malacia.


I reject your reality, I substitute my own !!
It's a testament to the Prison FC club he is part of.

Michael Scofield is Greenwood, Lincoln Burrows is Maguire and T-Bag is Giggs?

There is even a devil in the tattoo.

Gotta say the resemblance is pretty good, the tattoo artist knows his craft!


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Player: Martinelli
Gabriel Jesus vs Lisandro Martinez | Manchester United - Arsenal | 04-09-22



Established Member

Player: Zinchenko
IF this is true, Ten Hag should just go scorched earth on this, promote as many youngsters as he can and get 1-2 experienced signings in that have experience with a decent dressing room (They've just been linked with Sommer, which imo would be excellent for that).

Of course that will never happen because he's 99% getting cockblocked.


Throwback Thursdays in Kazakhstan for Saul Goodman
This is what I was thinking. It's a whole different level to what we have done. If we are having difficulty shifting the likes of Mari on £85k and Torreira on £70k how are they going to get rid of players like,

Ronaldo on £515k
de Gea on £375k
Varane £340k
Martial on £250k
Rashford on £200k
Maguire £190k
Shaw on £150k
Fred, Lindelof and van de Beek on £120k

Even if by some miracle they could get those players to leave for free without massive pay offs which is unlikely I can't see the Glazers sanctioning letting £300m worth of players (Transfermarkt values) go for nothing. I wouldn't be surprised if just purging that squad would cost in the region of £500m alone and that is before you start building a new squad.

The more I think about it, the more ****ed Man United are. When you consider the poor state of the stadium, training facilities and the infrastructure you could probably need to sink £2bn into United to get them to Man City levels.
Maguire lol, always wanted to know what a 190,000 pounds a week of total sh.t looks like. They are in much worse shape financially than they are on the field, shocking. I put it down to a sort of culture of arrogance. They are such a big, rich club I think they just thought they could throw money around and microwave success. There seems from the top down an entitlement to winning without being willing to do the hard yards. They don’t recruit well, they don’t develop young players anymore, and even the players seem to think just running out there in the uniform means the other team should just roll over. We complain about Rasputin Kroenke, and certainly they are nowhere near perfect; but damn it could be a lot worse we could have the Glazers as our owners.

Nothing and no one in the Universe is too big to fail, United are proving it daily.


Throwback Thursdays in Kazakhstan for Saul Goodman
@Juan Matas Beard, commiserations bro yes we are enjoying this; but true football fans like you and the true United fans who have stuck with club I do feel for you guys. The cocky gravy training and glory hounders are gone now; those guys were so damn annoying online; now we get to see who is a true United fan.


I reject your reality, I substitute my own !!
"Pragmatic approach", they say...

The guy who was supposed to build for the future. Over 400 million pounds spent and who knows how much wages on top of that.

But yeah, at least Ole got some results as he planned tactics based on players available.

Transfers from the link: Heaton, Pellestri, Ighalo, Van De Beek, Wan-Bissaka, Maguire, Diallo, James, Telles, Ronaldo, Varane, Cavani, Sancho, Bruno.

"The Norwegian gaffer spent over £400million in transfers during his three years at Old Trafford, but failed to win a single trophy during his time in charge."



Arteta In by November

Player: Martinelli
Ole results were massively helped by the unbelievable number of soft pens they were getting. The moment refs stopped giving that he was sacked. Ole has damaged more than any other manager did with some stupid high cost signings.

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