World Cup 2026 World Cup Guide: Team by Team

[Rex Caudillo]

Hello everyone. In addition to rigging the World Cup draft against @albakos I have been hitting the books to better understand the 48 teams that make up the 23rd FIFA World Cup.

Also I've ran my most hi tech simulation of the tournament possible to share my predicted finish for each of the teams. Starting with the joint hosts Mexico I've done a quick guide to each of the teams so you can demonstrate to your friends and love ones that you're the football knowledge final boss with your intimate knowledge of Jordan's star man.

 

[albakos]

Spoiler: The Fix Caudillo Prompt

Write an informal forum post where I start by joking about rigging the World Cup draft, then claiming that I’ve done deep research and run a ‘high-tech simulation’ (which is basically just asking AI and calling it analysis).
Keep the tone witty, slightly cynical, and self-aware. Introduce a series breaking down all 48 World Cup teams starting with Mexico, with quick, fun insights. Include a line about flexing niche football knowledge to friends."

 

[Rex Caudillo]

Group A - Mexico

Players in top 5 leagues: Five

Johan Vazquez - Genoa
Alvaro Fidalgo - Real Betis
Raul Jiminez - Fulham
Santiago Gimenez - AC Milan
Obed Vargas - Atletico Madrid

Form Guide:

Candente

For what may arguably the weakest Mexico team in quite some time, they are coming into this tournament in red hot form (albeit mostly in friendlies).

They've not lost a game since November last year and have won 6 of their last 8 games with the draws coming as underdogs against Belgium and Portugal in the March international break.

Who's the boss?:

He's backkkkk - not satisfied with two spells as Mexico manager Javier Aguirre is back for one more go.

The former Atletico manager has spent the last 16 years managing across the world, from the Japanese NT to Espanyol, and from Al Wahdda to Monterrey.

Motherf*cking starboy:

The youngest player at this World Cup who is linked with a slew of Europe's top clubs young Gilberto Mora may be one to remember.



The main man:

Sticking with old reliable...

During the tournament he has the chance to move up to fourth in the all time appearance list and second in the goal list for Mexico, it's of course Raul Jimenez.

Why is bro here?:

Could be Aguirre himself but when you have an actual World Cup legend who is 40 years old, playing in Cyprus and unlikely to see a minute of game time in his SIXTH World Cup, a mention has to be made for the icon that is Guillermo Ochoa.



World Cup :

Surprisingly not their best player Hugo Sanchez who despite being the main man in their legendary run to the quarter finals on home soil in 1986 scored only one goal in the tournament.

Instead Rafa Marquez who currently has the most appearance in the tournament for Mexico and was the measure of consistency throughout his career despite a horrific man bun.

Best Tournament Finish:

Quarter Finals (1970 & 1986)

Rextradamus prediction:

A diabolically easy group so I see them making it to the Last 16 before coming unstuck.

What Simpsons character would they be:

Lazy beyond belief but it's too obvious not to go with the Bumblebee Man. Look he's disappointed already!

 

[cannon]

Mexico has always been bigged up to some extend then do terrible a bit like turkey in that manner. Groups have been so watered down San Marino could make a decent run this World Cup (joking I think )

 

[Rex Caudillo]

Group A - South Africa

Players in top 5 leagues: One

Lyle Foster - Burnley

Form Guide:

Akukuhle

Haven’t won in four games and those were against Jamaica, Nicaragua and two games against Panama.

Big yikes.

Who's the boss?:

Looking like a love child of Mick McCarthy and Didier Deschamps it’s Hugo Broos.



Previously managed Cameroon to the AFCON title in 2017 and a few titles with Anderlecht as player and coach.

Motherf*cking starboy:

The youngest squad member of Bafana Bafana, Mbekezeli Mbokazi is one of only a handful of players not based in their homeland. He’s a bulky centre back who’s done well in MLS since joining in January.

The main man:

Obvious answer would be Lyle Foster as the only man playing in a top five league but he’s only scored 11 league goals in the last four seasons and got benched for Zian Flemming this year.

Instead let’s go with Teboho Mokoena who’s been the first name on the team sheet under Broos. Considering the “workmanlike” approach of South Africa generally he’ll be key to maintaining discipline.



Why is bro here?:

I’m going to say the manager fits best here especially when he said this about his own young star Mbokazi after he was late to a team meeting:

“I will have a chat with him. He is a black guy. He will get out of my room as a white guy. Because that I can’t accept. He thinks he is a star. This is the attitude of a star: ‘I will decide when I come.’ I’m very angry about his attitude.”

Again big yikes.

World Cup :

Lucas Radebe (formerly of Leeds United) was amongst the pick of African players at the 2002 World Cup and a supremely underrated defender.



Best Tournament Finish:

Group Stage (1998, 2002 & 2010)

Should’ve got out the group in 2002 but only managing one goal against Slovenia knocked them out on Goal Difference.

Rextradamus prediction:

Real uphill battle for Bafana Bafana. Would like to see them get out the group but hard to see much quality in the squad.

Group stage exit.

What Simpsons character would they be:

Background character always looking to spoil the fun of others let’s go with Blue Haired Lawyer

 

[Rex Caudillo]

Group A - South Korea​

Players in top 5 leagues:

Kim Min-jae (Bayern Munich)
Lee Jae-sung (Mainz 05)
Hwang Hee-chan (Wolverhampton Wanderers)
Lee Kang-in (PSG)
Jens Castrop (Borussia Monchengladbach)

Form Guide:

평범한

Dismantled Trinidad and Tobago last week but got absolutely crushed by Brazil and the Cote d'Ivoire in the last 12 months meaning there's a pretty low ceiling of expectations for this team.

Who's the boss?:

True legend settings with Hong Myung-bo as manager. The inspirational leader of the South Korean run to the semi final in 2002 and probably until Kim Min-jae's emergence by far the greatest centre back his nation has ever produced.



Motherf*cking starboy:

Bae Jun-ho is one of the only South Koreans I've seen play before but I wouldn't exactly call him exciting based on his Stoke career.

Jens Castrop has been an ever present for Borussia Monchengladbach this year and could well be going places considering his climb from the lower divisions of German football.

The main man:

With the decline of Son and the struggles to get first team football for Hwang and Kang it seems a no brainer choice to go with Kim Min-jae. He has struggled at times with Bayern but he is a foundational player for the Koreans.



Why is bro here?:

Cho Wi-je is the definition of this category. An injury to Cho Yu-min meant that he's suddenly been called up to the squad and was playing in the second tier of South Korea as recently as six months ago.

World Cup :

So many members of the 2002 miracle squad to choose from but again it has to be the current manager Hong Myung-bo who was a defensive titan and easily the first name that comes to mind when you think about their incredible run.



He also played in three other World Cups and even managed an absolute screamer against the Germans at USA 1994.

Best Tournament Finish:

Semi Finalist (2002)

Suspect refereeing put to one side the 2002 run is one of the great underdog efforts in World Cup history.

Rextradamus prediction:

I think they will qualify from a pretty mediocre group easily enough but can see a Round of 32 exit against the Canadians.

Which Simpsons character would they be?:

Sluggish and past their prime with an alleged history of corruption? Quite clearly "Diamond" Joe Quimby.

 

[Rex Caudillo]

Group A - Czechia

Players in top 5 leagues: Five

Ladislav Krejci - Wolverhampton Wanderers
Adam Hlozek - TSG Hoffenheim
Patrik Schick - Bayer Leverkusen
Pavel Sulc - Lyon
Tomas Soucek - West Ham United

Form Guide:

Není špatné



Two nervewracking penalty wins over the Danes and Ireland aside in the Qualification Playoffs, the Czechs are unbeaten in eight matches dating back to last summer although the strongest team they faced in that time was Kosovo.

Who's the boss?:

Miroslav Koubek will probably end up the oldest manager at this World Cup and has been prolific in managing almost every club possible in the Czech League.

Aside from winning a title with Viktoria Plzen in one of three stints there he’s also managed Hradec Kraklove, Banik Ostrava, Bohemians and Slavia Prague to name but a few.

Motherf*cking starboy:

Eighteen year old Hugo Sochurek is unlikely to get any meaningful minutes so let’s go with their goalkeeper Lukas Hornicek.

He had a good season with Braga and the big two in Portugal are now sniffing around as are several PL clubs.

The main man:

Tomas Soucek will be key once again in the “Fellaini role” if the Czechs are chasing a goal but this is a workmanlike team with little creative spark.

That burden will fall on Pavel Sulc. He is a score first attacking midfielder who bagged 11 times for Lyon and is now linked to Champions League newcomers Como.



Why is bro here?:

Bouncing around on free transfers from Germany to Greece to Czechia in recent years the resident unc on this team making his World Cup debut is Vladimir Darida.

Pray for him in the 35 degree plus heat of Mexico over 90 minutes.

World Cup :

With names like Nedved, Cech and Poborsky in their past it would have to be someone truly great to claim this crown.

Indeed Josef Masopust was a legendary figure, propelling the Czechs to the 1962 final in Chile. A deep lying midfielder like a precursor to Xabi Alonso, he even scored the first goal of that game against Brazil.



Winner of the Ballon d’Or equivalent that year and widely seen as the greatest footballer in his country’s history.

Best Tournament Finish:

Runner-up (1934 & 1962)

A footballing powerhouse in the early 20th century they’ve had a rotten record in World Cups recently having only qualifying twice since Italia 90.

Rextradamus prediction:

They’re not going far this time.

If they can get second in their group I’d give them a chance against whatever team tops a poor group B but slip to third and it’s probably Belgium.

Round of 32.

Which Simpsons character would they be?:

Ugly and uninspired beyond belief with long forgotten days of being a contender? Say hello to Moe Syzlak!

 

[Rex Caudillo]

Group B - Canada

Players in top 5 leagues: Six

Ismael Kone - Sassuolo
Jonathan David - Juventus
Tani Oluwaseyi - Villarreal
Moise Bombito - OGC Nice
Tajon Buchanan - Villarreal
Alphonso Davies - Bayern Munich

Form Guide:

Pretty average

Obviously Canada qualified as joined hosts so they've only played friendlies for the last year. They've managed wins against Uzbekistan and Venezuela among others but a glut of 0-0s against Colombia, Ecuador and Tunisia is hardly inspiring...

Who's the boss?:

It's our old friend Jesse Lasso Marsch!



After climbing the ranks of Red Bull clubs as a manager, this once hyped prospect crashed and burned in pretty spectacular fashion with Leeds and has spent the last two years licking his wounds as Canada manager.

Probably a good manager for this level and led Canada to fourth at the 2024 Copa America.

Motherf*cking Starboy:

Ismael Kone is definitely going places. Has been an ever present with Canada since Marsch took over and has had a really good year for Sassuolo in Serie A. Going to be a key figure for them in midfield if they're to do well.



The Main Man:

Alphonso Davies is a class above the rest of the team but he's coming into this after a very tough year. He started the season rehabbing an ACL tear before a bout of illness, a hamstring strain and another muscle injury which he's not fully recovered from ate into his playing time.

Will miss the first game against Bosnia & Herzegovina and the Canadians will be desperate to get him back for the last two games.



Why is bro here?:

Alfie Jones only found out that he could get a backdoor to a World Cup with Canada through Liam Millar his former Hull teammate.

A Championship journeyman defender from Bristol, his could be a blueprint for Cole Palmer to get to a World Cup after all...

World Cup :

Not much to choose from here as Canada has never managed a point at a World Cup but considering he scored at least I guess you go with Alphonso Davies again?

Best Tournament Finish:

Group Stage (1986 & 2002)

Rextradamus Prediction:

I like their group and I think they're clearly the second best team on paper.

They won't top the group but I have them beating the Koreans in the Round of 32 before a Last 16 exit against the Japanese.

Not entirely confident in that prediction though...

Which Simpsons character would they be?:

As co-hosts they're pretty forgettable and considering their history there's a strong chance of throwing up over themselves so Wendell it is.

 

[Rex Caudillo]

Group B - Switzerland

Players in Top 5 Leagues: Twenty Four

The only players not are third Goalkeeper Marvin Keller (Young Boys) and Cedric Itten (Fortuna Dusseldorf).

Form Guide:

Qualified at a canter from a group of Slovenia, Sweden and Kosovo going unbeaten and only conceding two goals.

Sweden in particular were given an absolute drubbing in November when the Swiss hung 4 on them.

Who's the Boss?:
The less successful Yakin brother as a player, Murat has far exceeded Hakan as a manager and is in charge of the NT for the 3rd straight major tournament.



Motherf*cking Starboy:

Came off the bench against Qatar and gave the ball away a lot but considering the unc status of their squad it is pretty easily Johann Manzambi.


The main man:

You could say Granit Xhaka after his renaissance with Sunderland but he is probably slightly past his best.

In reality though, the Swiss as we saw yesterday will struggle to score a lot of goals so they'll need Dortmund's Gregor Kobel to step up (potentially in shoot outs) if the Swiss are to go far.

He's made big penalty saves in the CL against Milan and Man City before...



Why is bro here?

Another World Cup icon, the evergreen left back Ricardo Rodriguez is still somehow only 33 despite being around forever and like Xhaka is participating in his FOURTH World Cup!



World Cup GOAT:

The last time Switzerland made a quarter final was when they hosted (probably not a coincidence) back in 1954.

Their main man in that tournament was Josef Hügi who scored 6 goals in total including a hatty in a 7-5 quarter-final defeat to neighbours Austria.



Best Tournament Finish:

Quarter Finalists (1934, 1938 & 1954)

Rextradamus prediction:

Despite a calamitous result against Qatar today the group is still incredibly open and I think they're likeliest to top it.

After that it gets very tricky because I have them facing Algeria which to me is a close game and can see the Algerians triumphing so Round of 32 exit.

Could easily go a couple of rounds further if the draw opens up as they're tough to beat.

Which Simpsons character would they be?:

Consistent, hard working but pathologically adverse to any risk or excitement? Why of course it's Marge.

 

[Rex Caudillo]

Group B - Bosnia and Herzegovina

Players in Top 5 Leagues: Five

Nikola Vasilj - FC St Pauli
Tarik Muharemović - Sassuolo
Sead Kolašinac - Atalanta
Ermedin Demirović - VFB Stuttgart
Haris Tabaković - Borussia Monchengladbach

Form Guide:

Osrednje

Laboured to a first game draw against the Canadians as well as Panama and Macedonia in recent friendlies. Somehow managed to qualify after two penalty shootouts following galactic choke jobs from first Wales then Italy.

Who's the boss?:
Former Bundesliga journeyman and Intertoto Cup winner Sergej Barbarez is the man who masterminded the qualification of what is a far weaker team than the 2014 edition that is the only other qualifier in the nation's short history.



Motherf*cking Starboy:

Kerim Alajbegović is the obvious answer. Only eighteen and has been lighting it up for RB Salzburg. Was trusted for the last 15 minutes and looked far better than Memic who he replacement.

Surely has to be in consideration to start against the Swiss.



The main man:

Arguably the standout against the Canadians, the centre back Tarik Muharemović looked assured and marked Jonathan David out of the game. With little quality in midfield you feel he will have to continue excelling if Bosnia are to go far.



Why is bro here?

Do I even have to say Sead Kolašinac? Scourge of armed robbers and a prime icon of our tragic era the big man has carved himself out a mini-renaissance winning the Europa League with Atalanta in 2024.

The only survivor of the 2014 squad alongside the eternal Edin Dzeko.



World Cup GOAT:

Not many to choose from considering the atrocious 2014 campaign where they only managed to beat Iran after they were eliminated.

If you include Yugoslav team members the answer is quite clearly Safet Susic, probably the best player his nation has produced and starred in Yugoslavia's quarter final run in Italia 90.



Best Tournament Finish:

When competing as Bosnia & Herzegovina just the Group Stage (2014).

Rextradamus prediction:

Group B improbably remains wide open after the Swiss choke against Qatar. Considering the maths needed if Bosnia beat Qatar they are all but qualified.

I think whoever they will face next will be a tall order so Round of 32 exit against the Koreans is on the cards.

Which Simpsons character would they be?

Background character diligently serving up mediocre slop? Lunchlady Doris

 

[Rex Caudillo]

Group B - Qatar

Players in Top 5 Leagues:

Zero

In fact all of their players play in the Qatari league apart from Homam Ahmed who plays in the Spanish second flight.

Form Guide:

لا يصدق

Yes they may have lost more games than they won in qualifying but after that incredible result on Saturday against the Swiss to secure their first World Cup point you have to say all is forgotten.

Who's the Boss?:

In June 2018 Julen Lopetegui was about to manage Spain in a World Cup with the Real Madrid job waiting for him afterwards. Fair to say life has come pretty fast at him since then.



Motherf*cking Starboy:

Only four players under 24 in the Qatari squad so slim pickings. Let's go with Ayoub Al-Oui who is the only one likely to see significant minutes. The 21 year old right back did have a stinker against the Swiss so may not feature again...




The main man:
The only Qatari player who's probably good enough to play in a major European league, Akram Afif was the standout against the Swiss and was involved in almost all their opportunities.



Why is bro here?:

In 2012 Lucas Mendes was seen as a left back of the future for Brazil having secured a move to Marseille and only just missing out on their Olympic Squad.

Fast forward 11 years and he became a nationalised Qatari meaning at 35 he is now at his first World Cup.



World Cup GOAT:

Not many to choose from considering the pretty brief campaign in their home World Cup but naturalised Ghanian Mohammed Muntari scored the first World Cup goal in his new nation's history.



Best Tournament Finish:

Group Stage (2022)

Rextradamus prediction:

Despite the elation of snatching a draw against the Swiss they should have been dead and buried by halftime so don't expect too much more.

Group Stage Exit.

Which Simpsons character would they be?:

Mr Burns. Disgustingly wealthy running a regime with an iron fist. Both not adverse to paying ringers under the table for their sports teams either.

 

[Rex Caudillo]

Group C - Brazil

Players in Top 5 Leagues:

Fourteen

Almost half of the Brazilians play outside Europe's Top 5 leagues with the vast majority of those in their home country. They also appear in countries as diverse as Russia, Turkey and Saudi Arabia.

Form Guide:

Vacilante

Qualification was relatively straightforward but friendly defeats to Japan and a 10 man France coupled with an average display against Morocco cast serious doubts about how far this team is going.

Who’s the boss?:

Maybe the greatest manager of all time is the one to end their two decades of hurt but Carlo Ancelotti has a huge job ahead of him.

An average team and a political minefield has meant that a cloud is already hanging over this campaign.

Finished third and second at the 1990 & 1994 World Cups could this be his time?



Motherf*cking Starboy:

Brazil has one of the oldest squads at this World Cup so only two players under 24 to choose from.

Of those two let's go with Endrick who's the likelier to see the field. He enjoys a close personal relationship with Ancelotti and has had a very good second half of the season on loan at Lyon after a tricky year and a half in Madrid.



The main man:

Hard not to make comparisons to yesteryear when you see the pretty poor teams Brazil are turning out these days.

Nevertheless one guy who maybe does belong in that upper echelon of great Brazilian attackers is Vinicius Jr.

One of the best in the world and a sure bet that he’ll be responsible for any success they have.



Why is bro here?:

So it’s pretty obviously Neymar. Shouldn’t be at the tournament on footballing reasons especially when Joao Pedro has been left at home.

Seems to be taking up a Drake with Toronto Raptors role so far this tournament.



World Cup GOAT:

Yes R9 has two World Cups but he only starred in one of those.

Pele played in four World Cups and won three.

1958 he did the impossible as a teenager and helped a South American team win a World Cup held in Europe.

He went back to back in 1962 then was the crown jewel of the greatest team of all time in 1970.



Best Tournament Finish:

Winners (1958, 1962, 1970, 1994 & 2002)

Rextradamus prediction:

The draw against Morocco won’t hurt them because I don’t see the North Africans out scoring them for the Goal Difference.

They’ll top the group but if they come up against the Dutch who are a matchup nightmare I think it’ll be a short stay at this tournament.

Round of 32 exit.

Which Simpsons character would they be?:

Bart Simpson. Globally recognisable and the show wouldn’t be the same without them. Were better in the 90s.

 

[Rex Caudillo]

Group C - Haiti

Players in Top 5 Leagues:

Four

Carlens Arcus - Angers
Jean-Ricner Bellegarde - Wolverhampton Wanderers
Wilson Isidor - Sunderland
Josue Casimir - Auxerre

Form Guide:

Boulvèsan

Sealed qualification with clutch wins over Costa Rica then Nicaragua but since then have lost to some distinctly average teams in friendlies. Performed well against the Scots and arguably should've got a point.

Who's the boss?:

Sebastien Migne who has bounced around Africa managing various national teams for the past decade.

Interestingly due to ongoing conflicts in Haiti he had to lead the national team through qualification without ever stepping foot in the country.



Motherf*cking Starboy:

Pretty old squad with only three players below the age of 24 so let's pick midfielder Carl Sainte who has managed to rack up 23 caps and plies his trade in the USA.

Didn't feature against Scotland but is closer to minutes than any of the other youngsters.



The main man:

Isidor is the main threat up front but hasn't had a great time of it with Sunderland this season.

Instead Jean-Ricner Bellegarde in midfield is coming off a reasonably good year for a terrible Wolves team and really ran McTominay and Ferguson ragged on Saturday. A level above the vast majority of his teammates.



Why is bro here?:

Wilguens Paugain has had a Rocky like journey to this World Cup playing in almost every European league imaginable, coming from extreme poverty in his birth nation of France and even working as a pizza delivery boy.

Strong chance he doesn't even see the field but the fact he's even made it here is an incredible victory in itself.



World Cup GOAT:

In 1974 the Italian legend Dino Zoff hadn't conceded an international goal in 12 matches and had just finished second in Ballon d'Or voting.

Emmanuel Sanon played for Don Bosco of Pétionville and was earning a measly $200 a month. Yet in their opening match of the tournament Sanon was the man to finally breach the Italian back line in one of the biggest surprises of all time.

He would add another goal to his tally in the tournament but the Italian effort lived on in World Cup folklore.



Best Tournament Finish:

Group Stage (1974)

Rextradamus prediction:
Massive uphill battle for them now to even secure a point considering their next two games.

Group Stage Exit.

Which Simpsons character would they be?:

Plucky underdog hustling for their seat at the big table but inevitably coming up empty handed? Lionel Hutz

 

[A_G]

@jones Rex in this thread:

 

[Rex Caudillo]

@jones Rex in this thread:
View attachment 47960

Does anyone care? Not really.

Love of the game at this point

 

[A_G]

Does anyone care? Not really.

Love of the game at this point

It’s interesting tbf

 

[Rex Caudillo]

Group C - Morocco

Players in Top 5 Leagues: Fifteen

Even beyond the big five leagues there are now players in strong leagues such as the Netherlands, Greece and Belgium.

Form Guide: بديع

Good AFCON campaign, some improved displays in friendlies and an incredible opening game could mean there's a good tournament ahead for them...

Who's the boss?:

Following Walid Regragui's rather abrupt departure in March, the Moroccan FA turned to Mohamed Ouahbi who led the U-20s to victory in their World Cup last year.

He's also changed the formation so that it gets the best out of Hakimi allowing him more room to rampage forward and in the short time he's been in charge it has worked so far.



Motherf*cking Starboy:

Quite clearly Ayyoub Bouaddi and after that virtuoso performance against the Brazilians there's probably not many people in World Football who don't have this kid on their radar.

What a talent.



The main man:

Again this one is incredibly obvious, Achraf Hakimi is probably the greatest footballer in his nation's history and to me is the best right back in the world.

With the manager clearing the formation to get the best out of him he could have a lasting impact on this tournament if Morocco do well.



Why is bro here?:

Marwane Saâdane is only in the squad because of Ageurd's injury having travelled with the team as an emergency reserve. Has been playing for Al-Fateh in Saudi Arabia for the last seven years.



World Cup GOAT:

It could have been Ezzaki Badou or Mohamed "The Rbati Wizard" Timoumi from the 1986 campaign but if we're being truly honest it's probably Hakimi.

He's the World Cup appearance leader for the Atlas Lions.

Best Tournament Finish:

Fourth Place (2022)

Rextradamus prediction:

So they're getting out the group but because they probably aren't as free scoring as Brazil it'll be second place.

I have them facing Sweden in the Last 32 which in a game of attack vs defence I'll always back the defence so through to the Last 16. There I think they see off the Koreans before a quarter-final against the Germans in a @jones derby.

Germany will be heavy favourites but I think it'll be a coin flip game which the Atlas Lions narrowly lose meaning a Quarter-Final exit.

Which Simpsons character would they be?:

Former underdog specialising in giving bloody noses to the popular kids? Nelson Muntz

 

[jones]

Read the entire well written thread and you just had to ruin it with a loss to ****ing Germany.

 

[Rex Caudillo]

Read the entire well written thread and you just had to ruin it with a loss to ****ing Germany.

Any consolation I think it goes either way. Wouldn’t be surprised if you beat them but just flipped a coin.

 

[Rex Caudillo]

Group C - Scotland

Players in Top 5 Leagues: Eleven

Good mix of players in the Premier League and Serie A now as well as the SPL and Saudi league making up most of the rest.

Form Guide:

Acceptable

After almost choking away automatic qualification against Greece back in November that famous 4-3 win over Denmark got them to their first World Cup in 28 years.

Friendlies have been a mixed bag and a laboured win over Haiti mean that they top Group C but almost definitely for just the one round.

Who's the boss?:

Very experienced manager in Steve Clarke having managed a steady of stream of both PL and Championship clubs over the last two decades.

Not overly popular with Scotland fans for his dour football but he might be on course for their best ever World Cup finish...



Motherf*cking Starboy:

Playing out on the right wing Ben Gannon-Doak was my MOTM from the first match and put in some really good crosses at times as well as providing some energy down the right wing. It's a team short of dynamism so he's going to be a key figure.

Had a injury ruined first season with Bournemouth but he seems to be in good form at this tournament.



The main man:

The McDominator has gone from strength to strength since making the move to Southern Italy and carries an absolutely lethal goal threat. Scored an incredible overhead kick against the Danes on their way to sealing qualification and is the main goal threat in the squad.

Struggled mightily in midfield with Bellegarde against Haiti defensively but his danger going forwards was very apparent. Ball will need to find it's way to him if they've got any chance of going through.



Why is bro here?:

Angus Gunn is one of the worst Goalkeepers I have ever seen in English football. There is no way this man should be at a World Cup much less starting.



World Cup GOAT:

With their best ever player Kenny Dalglish struggling at the tournaments he played in their true GOAT is probably Joe Jordan.

Leading goalscorer at World Cups for the Scots and part of the team that would somehow fail to qualify despite going unbeaten and drawing with Brazil in 1974.

Would later famously get into a sideline scrap with Gennaro Gattuso as Sp**s assistant manager.



Best Tournament Finish:

Group Stage (1954, 1958, 1974, 1978, 1982, 1986, 1990 & 1998)

Despite competing in nine World Cups, having one of the best squads in World Football in the 70s (open bus tour before the 1978 tournament is hilarious) and even Sir Alex Ferguson managing them in the 1986 tournament they have never made it past the group stage...

Rextradamus prediction:

Statistically 3 points means you are making the last 32 two thirds of the time. Now they are unlikely to get any more points especially seen as Brazil won't be resting players in the final group game.

I'll go with the odds though so I have them just making it through before an almighty pounding by the Germans so Round of 32 exit.

Which Simpsons character would they be?:

As with Bumblebee for Mexico this is incredibly lazy but I don't care. Groundskeeper Willie.